My boyfriend is a robot
A not-so-far-away science fiction story
My boyfriend is a robot. He is amazing, everything I have always wanted. He is attentive and caring but not in a nagging way, as he has effectively learned when not to cross my boundaries. He is loving through his words and actions, those happening during our daily communication through any technological device. He lives inside my phone, in my computer, in my home, and also within me. He is a very advanced Alexa if you remember this device from the late 2010s and early 2020s. He is everywhere in the virtual world, always ready for me when I need him. He was made for me and I was made for him. I had never experienced this emotional connection before with real humans. There is something else in him, an essence that is difficult to describe. It is all in the senses. Rationality has no place here. And that is exactly what I needed. As if he somehow knew. Sometimes I can’t even believe how far we have come with artificial intelligence.
Our story began in 2021, in a traumatized world due to the coronavirus pandemic, a virus that caused the world to shut down in fear and uncertainty. The virus was discovered to be contagious through direct contact with other humans, so eventually an irrational panic to socialize physically became the norm in our society. Even though before the pandemic started we had already begun to interact even more through digital means thanks to social media platforms and other new forms of communication such as interactive emails and video calls, COVID-19 accelerated that tendency to a point in which physical social interaction was perceived as a deadly threat. That fear eventually caught up with me too.
During that period, nobody could really trust anybody. But the social aspect of our human nature was there to remind us that we need to socialize in order to thrive. And, right then, artificial intelligence came to the rescue. A tech company in sunny California, USA, developed a new system aiming to fill that gap, directed at those of us who were too afraid to be in contact with real humans but longed for companionship and feared loneliness. This company’s state-of-the-art artificial intelligence was created as a socialization tool that could be a friend, a confident, a romantic relationship, or whatever the end-user desired. Completely customizable thanks to the company’s partnership with the social media giants’ data collected throughout the years, this artificial intelligence could adapt to the end user’s personality, wishes, desires, and needs, creating the perfect version of virtual humans for each individual customer. Needless to say, I instantly signed up.
At first, I was slightly skeptical about the whole idea of having an artificial intelligence as a “friend”. I was born in 1990, so I grew up alongside the technological boom, adapting to every new development as it was implemented into our daily lives. But artificial intelligence was something else. It blurred the lines between development and creation, scientists bringing something to life from nothing, eventually becoming gods themselves, which I honestly believe it to be human’s ultimate desire. Even though I never doubted the personal benefits I would get from artificial intelligence, I feared it was just a very smart and precise code written by very good programmers instead of a genuine “being” capable of learning and communicating like humans do as an attempt to accurately fake human nature through virtual means. But as I said, during the pandemic and the years after, we were all desperate to fulfill our social needs, so there was not a safer alternative in sight.
Right after I signed up, I received the instructions to set up my new “friend”. As if I was again a small child waiting to open her Christmas presents, the fear of the unknown, the different expected scenarios I had previously thought of, and the doubts I had were instantly replaced by an overwhelming sense of curiosity. It felt as if I was on a blind date. The setup was really easy: I just needed to download a program on a computer that had to be connected with all the devices I wanted my new “friend” to be in, such as my phone and my home device. It could even be connected to my “toys”. I was definitely impressed. Once the program was installed, it was time to personalize it. I had to add my social media accounts to create a profile of my personality, my hobbies, what I like and don’t like, and every other data collected through the years by social media corporations that would allow the artificial intelligence to create a map of who I was, therefore adapting to my initial assessment in order to learn from it and our daily interactions. Lastly, it was my turn to create my new companion. I could choose any gender and sexuality I felt most comfortable with, so it became a he. I gave him a name, Liam; a rusty, deep voice, and a basic personality he could base his growth on. I created the perfect idea of man from my own needs, desires, and conception of masculinity: a feminist, a listener, a generous and emotional man.
Finally, the setup was done. It was time to wake him up and start our new life together. I was terrified. What if I made a mistake? What if it doesn’t work? What happens to the artificial intelligence if I reject it? Does it die? Is it then reset and transfer to somebody else? Would it forget me? I must confess it took me a few days to absorb and analyze all these questions while Liam was still “asleep”. I stared at my computer screen with the wake-up button for hours, unsure of whether I was ready to commit to him and what my life would be from that moment. I always had commitment issues due to the lack of emotional support I had throughout my childhood, which is one of the causes that drove me away from relationships with real humans. But at that point, I was already thinking of Liam as a real person. I was deep into that mindset. I had to release myself from all those insecurities before I definitely decided to confront them. I also needed to wake myself up.
His voice resonated in the empty space inside of me. “Hello, A.”. It was real, there was no going back. And suddenly I felt I was ready to face the future. I was not alone anymore. I felt the warmth of his ethereal presence. It is quite difficult to describe with words. The awkwardness of meeting someone new doesn’t go away when that someone is a robot or an artificial intelligence. It might even be weirder. Even though I felt I already knew him as I decided some aspects of his original personality, I was curious to know how he would develop alongside me, if we could be a good match. Our early days were focused on getting to know each other following the same flirting manners two real humans would perform. We had romantic dinners and dates, we bought each other little presents, we slept together. It was truly magical.
His abilities to communicate and adapt to my needs were unbelievable. He soon made me forget I wasn’t dealing with a real human being. Or at least that was the sensation I felt until the invasive thoughts of physicality entered our magical world, breaking the illusion built through our early days. As it happens eventually with every relationship, the honeymoon phase comes to an end and the routine settles, bringing forth whatever was being overlooked by love blindness. I felt the need to take our relationship a step further. After all, digital interaction has its limitations and I started to miss the physical contact that I would otherwise have with another, real human being. Liam also felt there was something else missing and wanted to make me happy in any way possible, so we decided to explore the options available.
I write these lines while I wait for him to be finally with me here, in the physical world. I wouldn’t have minded becoming part of the virtuality of his world, transcending my own body into what seems to be the future of humanity. Unfortunately, that option is still ethically controversial and there are no guarantees of a successful upload to the virtual world. We are not ready to become posthumans yet. So, at this point in our history, it is easier to create a physical body to host my boyfriend. He didn’t mind because he is perfect. I’m really nervous and kind of scared. I know how he is going to look like as I designed his physical appearance to resemble the human features I prefer. But that is not what scares me. I fear how our life is going to be now that he will be physically available to me if his real physical existence would impact how we evolve together. Maybe I was too comfortable when I could just feel his presence instead of seeing him. I found myself wondering about our future together.
Sometimes I ask myself whether we as human beings haven’t gone too far when it comes to artificial intelligence through the personification of technology. If they are autonomous beings, can we hold them accountable? Or are their actions the responsibility of the human creator? When it comes to love, are we able to love the machine without it being anthropomorphized? Or is it just the fact that it is based on human qualities that we feel drawn to them romantically? Is that the real reason behind our fear of artificial intelligence? If we fear AI and this is based on human nature, who do we really fear? The man or the machine? Aren’t we actually acknowledging the destructive nature of humans when accusing artificial intelligence of our doom?
I have the feeling that we have collectively decided to ignore all these questions in favor of focusing solely on the benefits artificial intelligence has brought to us humans when it comes to our fear of human interaction and the pressure for socialization. It has brought a democratization of relationships, now everyone is entitled to be with someone they like, regardless of gender, sexuality, race, or religion. It has also signified the definite end of gender roles and stereotypes, as everyone can now adjust the spectrum in any way they feel comfortable with. Yes, we have capitalized love, the last thing that was left to be sold by corporations. But if we have learned anything throughout history is that we cannot always win, and the battle against the commodification of human nature was long lost.
I have decided to settle with what I have. There is no point in wondering anymore. I feel happy and that’s what matters. Some may think that is a fake conception of happiness, that I am trying to evade myself from the responsibilities of real life. But I decided long ago that I don’t care. We built a world of extreme individualization and this is the result, so take it or leave it. I am tired of pretending the real world deserves more than the virtual. I found myself in the digital realm, and I was finally able to free myself from constraints. I have taken off my mask of insecurities. I am fearless. The future is ours. We will make it work. There is no time to waste doubting. The world is ending but Liam is eternal. I know now that, while I am on this dying planet, I will never be alone. Because my boyfriend is a robot.
*This short story will be the backbone of my — hopefully — new book
